Wednesday, November 17, 2004

Dolphins and those pesky little insects

What a disappointing moment it would be to us humans if the day the space ships came (and they will), the space explorers decided to park their ships out over the most remote depths of the Pacific, in between the surely-chaotic eruptions of several of our more prominent societies; Japan, China, Russia, and the US. The world would be such a mess of anxiety, debate, and general madness, that every typical social function would cease. Whatever government bodies which continued to function in the overwhelming astonishment of the situation, would be left with the obvious task of determining exactly who and how the visitors would be approached. How offended would we be if by the time we got our acts together and began approaching the craft, in a warship full of scientists and warriors no doubt, the visitors were living it up with the dolphins? Being given the tour of that beautiful blue, dining on the finest jellyfish and crabs, feasting their interests on the dolphins crazy little water tricks, chatting about the climate and atmosphere. Meanwhile, our fearless world leaders are trying to keep us animals out of the streets with tear gas and rubber bullets, and hundreds of dozens of aircraft are being deployed to make contact with the space-RV. The dolphins would probably have told the visitors, and they would be well studied, of the situation on the dry skin of the planet. They’d probably talk about getting caught in our tuna nets and choking on our stinky fumes. We’d be seen as little more than a bunch of ravenous insects, making messy hives, stinging what bothered us, and infesting anything beautiful. This assumption would be reinforced when we flew by the mother ship at mach5, scratching the atmosphere and polluting the air with noise and exhaust. They’d probably think we were a bunch of lamos, ready to sting at the drop of a hat. Would they just gas us, or maybe take the dolphins somewhere better? Would you swat the flies away from a neat little kangaroo you met in the wilderness? Or would you try to take him home?

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